Ukraine's leading English-language newspaper since 1995

A way to a man’s heart is through his stomach… but it doesn’t work anymore.

SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA – We all know that a way to a man’s heart – Ukrainian or American – is through his stomach. The rule crosses the continents, but how easy is it to implement?

For many years, home cooking proved to be a strong competitive advantage for Soviet and then Ukrainian women. Passing the recipes scribbled on tri-folded, soiled pieces of paper to your daughter was like passing a secret “weapon.” With not many alternatives to a woman’s cooking – the variety of restaurants was scarce – it was easy to get a man “hooked” with mere borscht and sour cream.

The situation slightly changed in the post-Soviet years in Kyiv. With the development of restaurant industry and the emergence of exotic food places, eating out once in a while became the norm. Places like McDonald’s, Domashnya Kukhnya, and Puzata Khata are also affordable. They hardly replaced home cooking though.

The gears are shifted in San Francisco, where getting to a man’s heart the traditional way is very challenging.

First of all, eating out is, in many cases, comparable in price to grocery shopping. During a single trip to a supermarket (if you are not a “stock up” shopper) you usually spend somewhere in between $7 - $20. You can be sure to have a meal out for an amount in this range.

An average Ukrainian can easily be intimidated by the abundance and variety of food places in San Francisco. While Japanese or Thai restaurants may not be such a novelty in Kyiv anymore, the notion of Burmese, Ethiopian or Cambodian cuisines needs some time to get accustomed to. Tapas, vegan and raw food are also not something I would call “familiar” to an average Ukrainian.

And while quantity does not always transform to quality, in this case it does. San Francisco boasts amazing restaurants. And if you really wanted, you could possibly try a new restaurant and a new type of food every single day of the week for the longest time without overly straining your budget.

The situation complicates even further...yelp.com, the social networking type of website that lets people create profiles and write reviews about anything, has been very popular with American diners. Before you go to a restaurant, it is highly advisable to search for it on Yelp and read the reviews for “hints”: which dishes to avoid, what table to ask for. After your own dining experience, it is a common practice to post your own review of the food and ambiance. The “everyone-is-a-food-critic” type of mentality has been very popular in the United States these days.

One of the most popular reality shows among – you’d be surprised – men, Top Chef, features a number of highly experienced chefs in the United States who compete against each other in culinary challenges. Their food creations may quite easily have your mouth watering. Exposing men to these culinary masterpieces is of no help.

Take-outs have also been a blessing in disguise. While they can be a savior for a busy professional -- delicious, affordable and enjoyed at home in front of a TV -- the take-outs are not cooked by a woman. In other words, they add to the competition.

So men in San Francisco do not only have “exquisite palates,” they have the knowledge, the informational support, and many, many other options to choose from, if they happen to not like your cooking.

It would have been depressing…if there were no other ways to a man’s heart.

Lena Redko, a Kyiv native, lives in San Francisco and is studying for a master’s in business administration at the University of San Francisco. She can be reached at bonjourlena@yahoo.com