What do you need to keep local cinema goers happy? Hollywood blockbusters, comfortable seats, and popcorn seem to be enough.

Not at all. One of Kyiv’s oldest cinemas, Zhovten, recently announced the opening of another hall on its premises called Sweet Life, where viewers can smoke. The innovation looks like an obvious attempt to save Zhovten, which has been under threat of closing for a long time now. This move seems a bit extreme to me. The cinema, which may be shutting down because it’s just too cultured and arthouse, is now trying to stay afloat by promoting smoking. Of course, Sweet Life is not a regular cinema hall. It’s a musical-film cafe that won’t be showing feature films, but concert-movies about all the big stars. Tickets of Hr 50 should involve a “menu” with coffee or beer, and visitors can also order anything from Zhovten’s cafe. Sounds like a truly bizarre offer for a movie theater, though I’m certainly against its closing. After all, Zhovten is one of the few places in the city showing films in the original language, though a lot of them are screened in the smallest DVD-hall.

I often hear foreigners express indignation about the fact that most movies shown in Kyiv’s cinemas are fully dubbed. “Why not use subtitles like in all civilized countries?” they demand. Well, actually not all “civilized” countries do it this way, though some do. And yes, personally, I’d really prefer subtitles. Even a Japanese or Turkish film sounds better in the original. You can grasp the essence of the movie much better this way. And doing subtitles is a lot cheaper. But it’s not going to happen, because Ukrainian people aren’t used to reading while watching a movie. They’d find it too tiresome and stressful, so cinemas will lose clientele if they did it. Just look at what happened when the government passed the law to have films dubbed or subtitled in Ukrainian. I heard that a central Odesa theater may be closing down – all because people don’t enjoy watching films in Ukrainian, although they understand it very well.

Some cinemas dare to show subtitled movies. My favorite theater, Kyiv, regularly brings in arthouse and festival films, often in the original, too, while the rest of its program is mainstream. There is also Kinopanorama, located a few steps from Kyiv. It calls itself an “arthouse cinema,” which is reflected in its selection of films but also sounds like an excuse for having rigid old seats, popcorn in plastic bags and ticket offices without computers.

I really wonder if Zhovten’s enterprise with the smoking cinema will pay off. I’m afraid it’s likely to turn into a snack-bar with paid entrance, and those who would go there will not care much for the movies showing onscreen. The fact is, Kyiv movie goers are lazy and prefer silly horrors, action flicks and comedies to something witty and intellectual. Catering to the needs of the majority, cinemas give them what they want, and those who are not quite satisfied with that can stay home and watch DVDs.