I may not be a true patriot (I know, guilty as charged). But it still fills my heart with pride when I hear about a Ukrainian becoming an international star, or when Ukraine is mentioned in a Hollywood movie I am watching.
Unfortunately it doesn’t mean that the world knows more about Ukraine than it did before. For them, Ukraine is merely an exotic word. But at least “Ukrainian” has started replacing “Russian” in Hollywood movies. And, of course, there are the ladies: The recent success of actress Olga Kurylenko and model Dasha Astafieva shows that Ukraine is definitely part of a new trend. So here is an overview of how Ukraine and Ukrainians are portrayed in Hollywood movies, plus a list of celebrities related to Ukraine in one way or another.
Ukraine in Hollywood
Young American writer Jonathan Safran Foer is not Ukrainian himself, but much of his best-selling novel “Everything Is Illuminated” takes place in Ukraine. The main character (Foer’s own alter ego) sets out to Ukraine to find the woman who helped his grandfather escape death at the hands of the Nazis. Upon his arrival, he hires a translator, Alex, and his grandfather as a driver. In 2005, the novel was adapted into a movie by Liev Schrieber, starring Elijah Wood as Foer and Gogol Bordello front man, Eugene Hutz as Alex. But although the story develops in Ukraine, only a small fragment of it was shot on location – in Odesa and Lviv. The rest was filmed entirely in the Czech Republic. It’s really easy to tell because the train looks too fancy and neat and the roads are too smooth. Basically, the only real Ukrainian in the movie is Hutz (more on him below).
His character, Alex, speaks very ridiculous English, which despite the cliche, is similar to how Hutz speaks in real life. Phrases like: “Many girls want to be carnal with me … because I’m such a premium dancer!” sound very natural coming from him. However, the rest of the movie is not very realistic. Alex’s surname is “Perchov,” which is unlikely, and his grandpa’s dog is named Sammy Davis Jr., also a stretch. When Alex, his grandpa and Jonathan stop in a supposedly Ukrainian roadside hotel, they meet a very severe-looking hotel keeper who speaks Russian with a strong accent. So does the old woman whom Jonathan finally finds. Overall, the movie is sweet despite the flaws, though it’s definitely not made with Ukrainian viewers in mind.
“Italian Job” (2003) contains one of the most uplifting quotes about Ukrainians ever heard. The bad guy (Edward Norton) sells gold bars with the help of a Ukrainian named Yevhen, played by Borys Lee Krutonog. Later he kills Yevhen and his Ukrainian “brothers” get angry. At some point, one man advises the main character, Charlie (Mark Wahlberg), to beware of them: “Cause if there’s one thing I know, it’s that you never mess with Mother Nature, mother-in-laws, or mother-f***ing Ukrainians.” Now, isn’t that inspiring?
“Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull” (2008) was ridiculous to the point of absurdity. There was ancient-looking Indie (Harrison Ford) hiding from a nuclear explosion in a fridge, and afterwards coming out safe and sound. Yet there is one element in the movie that deserves our attention – Colonel Irina Spalko (another typical “Ukrainian” surname) played by British lady Cate Blanchett. When she meets Indie in the beginning of the movie, she asks him: “Where is it you would imagine I am from, Dr. Jones?” “Well, the way you’re sinking your teeth into those wubble-u’s, I should think maybe eastern Ukraine,” Indie replies. Apparently, Dr. Jones can tell an eastern Ukrainian much better than I can. For the most part, Spalko just shouts some Russian-like gibberish and looks like a military dame from the Soviet 1920s, but still – she’s a Ukrainian girl.
A very unexpected declaration of love for Ukraine and its women was made in the movie “Transporter 3” (2008). This is an action franchise about Frank Martin (Jason Statham), a driver whose task it is to transport important stuff, which often happens to be pretty girls. In “Transporter 3,” thugs kidnap a daughter of a Ukrainian official to force him sign an important contract. And it’s up to Frank Martin to take the girl, Valentina, from Marseilles to her dad in Odesa. Valentina is red-haired, sexy and has quite a temper. She speaks with an accent, calls Martin “the gay” and swears in Russian. Naturally, Martin assumes she’s Russian. But when he calls Valentina that, she takes it personally. “I’m not Russian, [I’m] Ukrainian. We are different people. Different, here and here,” she says pointing to her head and her heart. The girl playing her is Russian Natalia Rudakova, who was working as a hairdresser in New York when she was spotted by French director Luc Besson. He co-authored the screenplay for the movie. Why did he make her Ukrainian? Maybe it’s all due to the Ukrainian birthplace of Milla Jovovich, to whom Besson was briefly married.
Ukraine girls
“Ukraine girls really knock me out,” sang the Beatles though it’s doubtful if they really knew the difference between Russians, Ukrainians and Georgians. Still many men would agree with them – those who have been here and those who have simply heard lots about Ukrainian beauties. Such opinions are backed well by the Ukraine-born celebrities.
Hollywood star, actress and model Milla Jovovich, who appeared on numerous magazine covers and starred in blockbusters like “The Fifth Element” and “Resident Evil,” is often called Ukrainian-born. She was indeed born in Kyiv in 1975 to a Montenegrin Serb father and a Russian actress, Galina Loginova. Then at the age of five, the family left for the United States. Many years later, Jovovich paid some visits to Kyiv, demonstrated decent Russian skills and even sang a song in Ukrainian at a press conference. But apart from being born as a Ukrainian citizen, Jovovich cannot be rightfully called a Ukrainian, and has no real roots here.
Another Ukraine-born American celebrity is Mila Kunis – Milena Markovna Kunis, born in Kyiv in 1983. In 1991, her family moved to Los Angeles and, in 1998, she got her first star role in “That ‘70s Show.” Since 2002, Kunis has been dating Macaulay Culkin, best known as the “Home Alone” star. Her biggest film roles so far are in the comedy “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” and action movie “Max Payne,” which featured another Ukrainian, Olga Kurylenko.
Olga Kurylenko was probably the most discussed Ukrainian in the world last year, due to her role as the Bond girl in “Quantum of Solace” movie. Being probably the very first Bond girl who had no sexual relations with agent 007 (Daniel Craig), she, in a way, made a statement: Ukrainian women are not just pretty but also tough. Though Kurylenko didn’t play a Ukrainian in the movie, her character Camilla is a daughter of a Latin American general and a Russian ballerina. Kurylenko was born in Berdyansk and, at the age of 17, started a modeling career in Paris. In 2001, she became a French citizen and, a few years later, began a film career. She started with an episode in “Paris, Je T’aime” shorts collection, playing a vampire alongside Elijah Wood. Her first major part was in “Hitman,” where she portrayed a damaged but seductive Russian girl next to a nonchalant Timothy Olyphant. Currently she’s working on several film projects and hopefully we’ll see Kurylenko grow into a big actress and shame those who believe that “Quantum of Solace” was her only moment of fame.
Another, big Ukrainian newsmaker last year was Dasha Astafieva, a singer and a model, who was picked out as the playmate of the jubilee 55th anniversary issue of American Playboy magazine. Born in Dnipropetrovsk in 1985, Astafieva first became famous as part of the Ukrainian pop duet NikitA, where she sings songs like: “You’re my soldier of crazy battles, you’re my frigate in the lakes of love…” But what Astafieva couldn’t do in the U.S. as a singer, she did as a nude model: She made an impression. In 2007 she became the playmate of the year in the Ukrainian version of Playboy and caught the eye of the legendary Playboy publisher, Hugh Hefner. Ukrainian brunette Astafieva beat other contestants – all blonde Americans, to be the jubilee playmate. She traveled to the U.S. and stayed at Hefner’s Playboy Mansion in Los Angeles for two weeks.
Speaking of models, Ukrainian ones seem to be quite in demand among world famous designers.
Snejana Onopka is one of the best known Ukrainian supermodels. She moved from Severodonetsk to Kyiv at the age of 15, got noticed by a foreign model agency scout, and in two years was among the leading catwalk models for Burberry, Chanel, Valentino, Gucci, Prada, Jil Sander and Louis Vuitton.
Still in 2007, 17-year-old Mariya Telnaya was going to school in Kharkiv when she was spotted by a modeling agency representative. Soon afterwards she was in Paris, walking the catwalk as Masha Tielne for Givenchy, Nina Ricci and YSL. Later she did shows for Marc Jacobs, Alexander McQueen, Chloe, Louis Vuitton, Miu Miu and others. Telnaya (or Tielne) is easy to recognize for her giant, elf-like eyes – with those she easily stands out in any model crowd.
Ukraine boys
There are some Ukrainian names that everybody knows so well, I hardly need to mention, but still I must. Those are Andriy Shevchenko and the Klitschko brothers. Shevchenko, originally from Yahotyn (Kyiv Oblast), started out as a soccer player for Dynamo Kyiv and after a number of successes advanced to an international career. In 1999, he transferred to A.C. Milan, and in 2006 left it to join English Chelsea owned by Russian Roman Abramovich. Typical of any successful football player, Shevchenko is married to a model, Kristen Pazik, and even did some modeling himself for his personal friend, designer Giorgio Armani.
While WBC world heavyweight champion Vitali Klitschko has gone deep into Ukrainian politics, his brother Wladimir continues an international career as a boxer, currently holding the IBF, WBO, IBO and Ring Magazine world heavyweight titles. Apart from boxing, Wladimir Klitschko had two episode roles in movies. In “Ocean’s Eleven” (2001), he gets into the ring with Lennox Lewis in a Las Vegas casino, which is about to be robbed by the crew of Danny Ocean (George Clooney). He also appeared in “Keinohrhasen” (Rabbit Without Ears), starring and directed by the famous German actor Til Schweiger. However, his latest onscreen appearance is the most unexpected. He played a part of the cool dancing cowboy in the video “Part of Me” by Chris Cornell and Timbaland. The story has it that Chris Cornell (ex-vocalist for Soundgraden) met Klitschko through a streetfight – or an attempt at one. As a result, the two became friends.
Another famous Ukrainian, Eugene Hutz (or Yevhen Hudz), is known as the front man of gypsy-punk band Gogol Bordello and a film actor. Born 1972 in Boyarka near Kyiv to a Russian-Ukrainian-Roma family, Hutz started his first band when still in Ukraine. After a long emigration journey through Poland, Hungary, Austria and Italy, Hutz’s family ended up in America. Finally settled in New York, Hutz met the members of his future band. In 1999, Gogol Bordello released its first album and soon grew into a worldwide sensation, playing at such festivals as Coachella, Bonnaroo, Lollapalooza, Glastonbury, Reading, Leeds and many others. Hutz also made a name for himself as deejay in New York. He had his film debut in the aforementioned “Everything’s Illuminated,” after having a chance meeting with the director Live Schreiber, who was rather desperate to find the right person for the role. In 2008, Hutz starred in Madonna’s directorial debut “Filth and Wisdom.” Apparently he made a big impression on the pop queen when performing “La Isla Bonita” together with her at “London Live Earth 7” in July 2007.
The Ukrainian origin of American actor Jack Palance (1919-2006) was never a big secret. Born Volodymyr Palahniuk in Hazle Township in Pennsylvania, he was the son of Ukrainian immigrants. His coal miner father came from Ivane Zolote in Southwestern Ukraine and mother came from Lviv region. Palance had a great many roles in films, onstage and on television during his 50-year-long career. He had a breakthrough part in “A Streetcar Named Desire” as Marlon Brando’s understudy, was nominated for Oscar several times and finally got it for his role in “City Slickers.” Palance was notably proud of his origins. When in 2004 he was present as a guest at the Russian Nights festival in Los Angeles, where he was to receive a People’s Artist of Russia (Narodniy Artist) award, Palance simply said: “I think that Russian film is interesting, but I have nothing to do with Russia or Russian film. My parents were born in Ukraine: I’m Ukrainian. I’m not Russian. Excuse me, but I don’t belong here.” With that he left the room. Interestingly, another American actor who was scheduled to receive the same award that night was Dustin Hoffman. He accepted it noting that his grandparents came from “Kyiv, Russia.” Well, to be a great actor you don’t need to be good at geography.
Another famous Palahniuk – the cult writer Chuck Palahniuk – kept his surname. Actually it’s supposed to be pronounced “Palanik.” But Ukrainian translators of his books transliterate it as “Palagnyuk,” just like the writer’s own Ukrainian grandpa must have pronounced it before he left his native country for Canada. Palahniuk is best known for his conter-culture novel “Fight Club,” which was made into a movie starring Edward Norton and Brad Pitt. The film version of another book by Palahniuk, “Choke,” was recently shown in Ukrainian movie theaters.
American film director Vadim Perelman was always well aware of his Ukrainian origins. Born in Kyiv in 1963, he lost his father in a car accident at the age of nine. Five years later, he and his mother were allowed to leave the country. After a year, the two reached Canada and started a new life. Perelman is best known for his debut movie “House of Sand and Fog,” which he had both written and directed. The movie starring Jennifer Conneli and Ben Kingsley received three nominations for Academy Awards.
It turned out that one of Hollywood’s main tough guys, Sylvester Stallone, also has Ukrainian roots. His mother Jacquelyn Stallone’s grandma was born and grew up in Odesa. Many years later, in 2002, she took a trip to Odesa to trace her roots. Unfortunately, her son was too busy to come along.
